5 Traits of a Gentleman, are You One?

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Being a gentleman has a long history of discussion.  Some think the traits of a gentleman consist of how you dress while others say it is how you treat a lady.  Still, others will say it is how your hair looks, or how you enter a room, or even how you smell.  It is all these things to some degree but ultimately it is so much more.
Contemporary gentlemen are distinguished men.  They exhibit certain internal qualities that can be seen by others with little effort.  These men raise the bar for everyone around them, inspiring others to greater heights.  However, they take no credit for this, it is all just part of who they are, their consistent and authentic character.
 
While this subject is very broad and could be debated for hours, over a good bourbon with friends, here are the 5 traits of a gentleman we think are most important.
Integrity
The old adage goes – Integrity is doing the right thing even when no one is looking.  A Gentleman shows honor to those around him by taking responsibility for his actions.  Quickly owning his mistakes and making them right.
 
Showing a high level of accountability in both public and private matters will allow you to move faster through issues and become stronger on the other side.  Don’t waste time with excuses, take ownership, and build on these setbacks.
Confidence
Be intentional, live a life with meaning and purpose. Know what you want and be clear in your actions.  Aligning your actions with your purpose gives you assurance in what your next steps forward will be.
 
Don’t wait for the perfect time, the only perfect time is now.  Come at life head-on and be brave in the face of adversity.
Humility
Gentlemen do not care about praise and attention, this is not his purpose.  Let your actions speak louder than your words.  Silent confidences
 
Ask for help, but don’t look at this assistance as a weakness but as an opportunity to grow and develop.  Never stop learning and always be teachable, no matter what, there is always a lesson or skill to be acquired, especially from others around you
 
Put relationships before the need to be right.  Celebrate the accomplishments of others  Always know and understand who you are and know your limitations.  Have an accurate and positive picture of yourself.
Caring
These are the little things gentlemen do in everyday life to show dignity to other people.  As simple as holding a door open, or saying hello and acknowledging them.  Giving a helping hand where it’s needed, or buying someone a meal.  These small actions are not solely for the recipient but it may be an inspiration for action from someone observing.
 
Be generous with your time, both with people you know and strangers.  You just never know how much they may need it – coffee in the park, volunteering at the food bank, or building houses.  The benefit goes both ways.
 
Chivalry is not dead, it is very much alive.  Opening doors, pulling out chairs, and walking on the street side of the sidewalk are only a few.  Showing a lady respect is worth more than a thousand words of inspiration.  
 
Forgiveness, forgiving others can be hard, but rewarding.  Harboring a grudge only builds and strengthens walls between people.  Forgiving quickly will keep these walls from ever being built.  Talk it out, discover what’s going on.
 
You must also remember to care for yourself, if you can’t care for yourself how can you care for others.  Eating properly will help keep you healthy.  Exercise will help keep you strong.  Look and wear what makes you feel confident.  Occasionally, check-in with yourself, make sure you are doing the most to be the best you.  
 
Finally, pray.  Pray for others, the place you live, your leaders, your family, and yourself.  Always be grateful for what you have and what you can provide.
Listening
This trait could be wrapped up under care but it is so important I thought it should stand on its own.  
 
Everyone wants to be heard.  Being heard makes people feel important, like their opinion matters.  When you listen and take a genuine interest in what others are saying, they feel like royalty.  If you do this right, the world around will disappear and the only thing left will be the conversation.
 
Don’t be distracted, put away your phone, and focus on the person.  Focus, in general, is what drives us forward, what you focused on will prosper and grow.  Contrary to popular belief multitasking does not work, we are wired to do one task at a time.  
 
Take your time with your replies, analyze the situation, and respond thoughtfully.  Use fewer words to get your point across, focus on what’s most important.  Lastly, ask open-ended questions, this ensures the conversation will last.
Final Thoughts
You may be thinking to yourself, these are awesome traits for anyone to have and you would be right.  Anyone can evolve and grow into these, only a true gentleman will have all these traits in perfect balance.  
 
Now get out there and take on the day, let your gentleman loose on the world and see what happens.
Do you have any other traits to add to these 5 traits of a gentleman?  How do you interact with the world?

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